This will sound completely fucked beyond belief, but truth is, most of us spew out all that smooth, sexy shite just to worm our way into someone’s pants — all whispering sweet bollocks and fake deep thoughts, acting like we are Casanova with a brain. And the second we’ve busted a nut, we are off, sniffing around for the next poor sod to feed the same tired, wank-stained lines to.
It’s like a never-ending shagging carousel of recycled bullshit, and we keep riding it till we delude ourselves we have found the one. But even then — oh, no, we don’t stop there — we go and cock it up so epically, so fucking catastrophically, we are left sat there, dick in hand, wondering what in the actual fuck just happened.
That’s life, innit — a relentless cycle of lust, lies, and fucking everything sideways till there’s nothing left but regret and a cold takeaway.